That sounds like advice that would come from God - not only about how we are to raise our children, but how He “raises” His children.
Everyone needs love - especially the type of love that has its source in God. His love is a love that is undeserved, fair, just, essential and life-giving. It is a love that may require a self-sacrificial act for the good of anyone who God brings into our lives - whether a family member, friend or someone who enters our life for a brief moment. It is a way of acting “with grace and mercy” toward another person rather than a feeling that may be fleeting.
But there is also a need for accountability - being responsible, first to God and then to others for sharing His love. This means how we treat one another, in our speech, and our actions. Do we encourage, and build up; or demean and tear down with our words. Words have power, to bring life and hope, or tear a person apart with sarcasm, and antagonism. Gossip and slander has destroyed many with it's deadly poison; and caused much needless heartache. It only takes telling a story once, for it to be broadcast far and wide, and usually "altered", with each time it is told. The results of the spreading of rumors and twisted stories have resulted at times in violence and murder. A person's character can be destroyed in a community, and if the person is innocent, the damage has already been done, and it has been known to cause suicide. Life has been made unbearable for that person, by the uncontrolled tongues of idle people with too much time on their hands.
Thru the years, in many situations where I've cared for the elderly, and terminally ill, I've observed those who have sunken into depression and hopelessness, have been abandoned even by their kid's, and those facing death alone, and listened to many stories of those who have been falsely accused, or rumors that have spread and the destruction it has caused in people, and their families. It is heartbreaking. At times I've had the privilege of bringing reconciliation, forgiveness, and restoration to some of these cases. When people are facing their death regrets of the wrongs they have done sometimes moves them to seek forgiveness and reconciliation before it's too late. It is a great blessing to see this happen, and when it does, the changes in the people is remarkable, the forgiveness, love restored, and most important the peace in the soul of those involved brings the person to the place where they can face death without fear, knowing they have made things right. Psalms tells us "blessed in the sight of the Lord is the death of his saints". When a child of God dies, he knows his destination, he knows he will see his Savior on the other side.
But not all the time. Sometimes the scars have never healed, the wounds have gone too wide and deep, and the one's involved aren't willing to admit the wrong's done, hardness of heart has taken over. These situations are very hard to watch, and unfold; because fear has torment. Those in bondages to unforgiveness, and bitterness die with no peace, and the uncertainty of the unknown of eternity. It takes a great deal of help from the Lord to remain faithful in service even in this situation.
It is the same in the body of Christ; words spoken that should not be, assumptions made, rumors spread, and suspicion develops.
We forget we are all sinners, saved by the grace and love of Jesus. We all stand on equal ground. All our titles and degrees mean nothing really, it is only because of His mercy and love that we can stand forgiven.
Although God has given each of us the freedom of choice, we are also responsible to Him for each and every choice we make. Whatever we do and wherever we do it, we are accountable to Him to show His love. When we are born again, we are born to live His love, show His grace and demonstrate His mercy.
Scriptures to ponder:
Psa 39:1 To the chief Musician, even to Jeduthun, A Psalm of David. I said, I will take heed to my ways, that I sin not with my tongue: I will keep my mouth with a bridle, while the wicked is before me.
Pro 10:18 He that hideth hatred with lying lips, and he that uttereth a slander, is a fool.
Pro 10:19 In the multitude of words there wanteth not sin: but he that refraineth his lips is wise.
Jas 3:6 And the tongue is a fire, a world of iniquity: so is the tongue among our members, that it defileth the whole body, and setteth on fire the course of nature; and it is set on fire of hell.
Jas 3:7 For every kind of beasts, and of birds, and of serpents, and of things in the sea, is tamed, and hath been tamed of mankind:
Jas 3:8 But the tongue can no man tame; it is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison.
Jas 3:9 Therewith bless we God, even the Father; and therewith curse we men, which are made after the similitude of God.
Jas 3:10 Out of the same mouth proceedeth blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not so to be.
Jas 3:11 Doth a fountain send forth at the same place sweet water and bitter?
Jas 3:12 Can the fig tree, my brethren, bear olive berries? either a vine, figs? so can no fountain both yield salt water and fresh.
Jas 3:13 Who is a wise man and endued with knowledge among you? let him shew out of a good conversation his works with meekness of wisdom.
Jas 3:14 But if ye have bitter envying and strife in your hearts, glory not, and lie not against the truth.
Jas 3:15 This wisdom descendeth not from above, but is earthly, sensual, devilish.
Jas 3:16 For where envying and strife is, there is confusion and every evil work.
Jas 3:17 But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, and easy to be intreated, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality, and without hypocrisy.
Jas 3:18 And the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace of them that make peace.