When I think of love, these scriptures define love to me in the best sense:
2Co 6:6 By pureness, by knowledge, by longsuffering, by kindness, by the Holy Ghost, by love unfeigned,
1Pe 1:22 Seeing ye have purified your souls in obeying the truth through the Spirit unto unfeigned love of the brethren, see that ye love one another with a pure heart fervently:
Why do I look to these scriptures the most when I think of the best definition of love?
Because of one word that's in both; unfeigned. Because if love is true, from the heart, and real, it will have these attributes:
UNFEIGNED
un-fand' (anupokritos, "unfeigned," "undisguised"):
The Greek word occurs only in the New Testament (1 Timothy 1:5; 2 Timothy 1:5) and is designative of the moral quality of faith as "the mark of transparency and simplicity of soul--the most complete and distinct exponent of a man's character--the natural hypothesis of a pure and good heart--a readiness to believe in goodness" (Martineau, Hours of Thought, First Series, 86). Compare 2 Corinthians 6:6; 1 Peter 1:22; James 3:17.
Webster's Revised Unabridged Dictionary
(a.) Not feigned; not counterfeit; not hypocritical; real; sincere; genuine; as, unfeigned piety; unfeigned love to man.
When you really ponder these definitions, and then take a long look at what many think of as love today, you come away realizing how rare true, honest love is.
It's the same with listening to someone's conversation. People develop an art of using conversation to insert a message they want to convey; without being open and honest about it. As you stand and listen to them, it becomes plain that they are making a point to you that has nothing to do really with what is coming out of their mouth. You are left to interpret what their real meaning is; it's a mental exercise and skill you have to develop with each encounter. After you've peeled back the layers, you find they either are undermining you, fishing for information, or placing themselves as "counselor" in your life; as they spin their tale.
The older you get the more you realize this is a waste of your time, and start finding ways to avoid these kind of people. At almost 65, I want less and less to do with double-talk and double messages. After less than five minutes, I realize if the one who is speaking to me is "unfeigned", or if I'm being taken for a ride again. If I am, I look for the first opportunity to exit. The bible gives some good advice about this:
2Ti 2:16 But shun profane and vain babblings: for they will increase unto more ungodliness.
My mother said to me more than once; "If you have a couple of true honest friends in your lifetime, you are very fortunate. People who will be honest, and love and accept you as you are."
She was right. Unfeigned love is rare, and to be cherished.
Unfeigned love, and truth are like an oasis in the desert.
Lorna Couillard